He's mine.

My real life sucks like a trash filled with poop. But in my dreams, I was the queen. 

I had a perfect face. I am a Goddess. But on the other one, I have nothing to brag.

I’ll admit, I am a very clever girl. I am a scholar now on a science high school. I was taught that education was an important thing and I’m bowing down just to have good grades.

I’m almost at the end of my high school life. Next school year will be my last. 

To describe my experiences, Freshmen year sucks and so with Sophomore’s. This Junior year also did 100% suck since I was totally broke. Only 1/4 of my heart was left un-eclipsed.

You see, I was in love with this guy. Let’s give him the nickname as ‘Tally’. He’s tall, white and Korean. He wears eyeglasses and smiles like a God. He’s so cool at school right now. We used to be so close. We were classmates. We talked, laughed, discussed things everyday. He liked me and I liked him. But, that was before.

Just this Junior year, we found out that we’re not on the same class. I was sad that time. I don’t know on his side. 

The only communication between us is that we were just greeting when we pass by each other on the corridors of the school. That’s not enough.

I did nothing for five months without talking. Then, this day came when he borrowed a book from one of my classmate. He saw me and at that moment when our eyes met, I don’t know what to do. He started to say ‘Hiii…’, I was then confused. Will I greet him too? My body froze.

He then left the room. I felt something odd in me. I was like ‘what the fuck did just happened? i did not do anything. arrrgh’.

I’m a total fool. I hate myself that time.

5pm and its time to go home. I walked by our school’s garden and felt the cold air. I liked it. It made me feel so relaxed. At the minute when I look open my eyes, I saw Tally, he was with this girl. I think they were talking all by themselves. They did not see me. I looked into Tally’s face and his face was the same face just this morning when he saw me. It was all red. That time, I ran away. I don’t know why but I kept on running. I never looked back. I cried and ran faster. I was also scared.

I got home late.  I went to my room and wrote on my diary. I was broke. Heartbroken. I cried all night.